Some people argue that we should ban Halloween. And I would raise my pitchfork and follow them, were it not for a few considerations.
Let us be clear. I am not a massive fan of Halloween. There are better holidays, like Christmas or Talk Like a Pirate Day. Even so, Halloween should stick around.
Stickiness happens to be one of the stronger arguments against it. Parents complain that all that candy gives their kids cavities. And then it gives them cavities.
Not because the adults steal the candy. My mom and dad always denied it, anyhow. Parents just get cavities by association.
The fact that high candy consumption might cause teeth to lose their points is certainly a strong point against Halloween.
But without all those cavities, how would dentists make a living? Abolishing Halloween would mean throwing nine out of 10 dental professionals out of work.
As someone who carefully follows employment statistics only when I have nothing to read in the dentist’s office, I cannot justify this risk.
And let’s not forget the excess of Halloween costumes stuffed in the closets of children across the nation.
Even I still have my old clown getup, though I haven’t gone trick-or-treating for over a decade.
If we did away with Halloween, to whom would we give those scary costumes? To the armed forces?
According to Professor Google, the U.S. boasts about 2 million military personnel and 72 million children.
Unless each service member got 36 costumes, canceling Halloween would lead to a ton of waste. We try to be an environmentally friendly country, at least when it suits us. So we can’t have that.
But Halloween doesn’t just prevent waste and unemployment in the dental sector. The holiday teaches kids valuable lessons.
Copyright 2024 Alexandra Paskhaver, distributed exclusively by Cagle Cartoons newspaper syndicate.