Up to code

In the honest spirit that characterizes great software engineers, I acknowledge that I am not a great software engineer.
Other folks go around and found Google or Amazon or businesses whose stocks are higher than the tip of Mount Everest.
Or maybe it’s Denali. I confess I never really paid attention to the finer points (or valleys) in geography class.
That’s probably why I ended up in a career that doesn’t require me to go outside.
Are the trees in flower? Is there a beautiful blue sky? I don’t even know. I’m glued to my computer screen.
I can guess the seasons pretty well, anyhow. Living in New Jersey, I can confidently assert that if it is cold and nasty outside, it’s anywhere between October and April.
Alternatively, it might be between May and September. I haven’t looked out a window for a while now.
Hey, my work is important. I may be a low-level software engineer working for a megacorporation, but someone has to change the color of a button from teal to dark blue.
If it weren’t for people like me, you might stumble onto a webpage where the text is four pixels too far to the left.
One small adjustment for an engineer, one giant leap for the Internet.
I spend most of my days fixing little things like that.
Somehow I always end up with a few extra semicolons. I hope the webpages I assembled don’t mind.
I’ll just park them at the end of this sentence and come back for them if I need ‘em. ;;;
Coding can be a lot of fun. As you work, you can watch whole ideas come to life.

You can build your own social media application, or an e-commerce website, or anything you can imagine. Then you can rake in the bajillions of dollars it makes you.
Note I say “you” and not “I.” I can’t build anything as cool as a social media app that is also an e-commerce website.
Once, though, I built an app where you could write your daily to-dos. It displayed them like virtual Post-It notes on your screen.
Unfortunately, whenever I have to write down my todos, I forget what they are. I never added any Post-It ideas to my website. And no one else did, either.
It turns out that many of the multimillion-dollar apps have teams of geniuses behind them.
I’m not asking for multimillions here. I’d be totally fine with, like, one or two million dollars. Just sayin’.
But I’m about 25% of a genius, and that’s a liberal estimate. I can’t compete in that market.
Maybe if I went outside, took a walk, and aired out my brain, I’d be able to think of an idea that would revolutionize the world.
But seeing as it’s anywhere between May and September right now (I’m almost certain that’s right), it’s probably too hot outside.
And if it’s between October and April, it’s too cold.
So if you’ll excuse me, I’ll pick up my spare semicolons, take a deep breath, and return to coding.
One day, maybe I will be a great software engineer.
But until then, someone has to increase the font size in my company’s copyright notice.

Copyright 2025 Alexandra Paskhaver, distributed exclusively by Cagle Cartoons newspaper syndicate.