The true meaning of July 4

Every year, there comes a day that we Americans celebrate by blowing stuff up and putting down large servings of meat.
That day, July 4, commemorates our creation as a nation. As God is our witness, we swear we will never be hungry again, and we won’t be. Not after 37 hamburgers.
Before we all sink into food comas, we should ponder a bit on the origins of our national birthday.
Thomas Jefferson said it best when he wrote, “Stop quoting me in articles about July 4, because boy does it get annoying, and oh, all right, here goes. When in the Course of human events…”
And there was something about breaking political bonds between the US and the UK. Or maybe it’s the other way around.
Our Declaration of Independence was a masterful piece of writing, almost as good as this humor column.
It stated that an island couldn’t rule a continent… no, wait, that was Paine’s “Common Sense.”
It declared that We the People… no, hold on, that’s the preamble to the Constitution.
The Declaration of Independence said… said… some independency stuff, is what it said.
If, on our national holidays, we take just a few minutes to review our founding documents, perhaps we would grow more unified as a nation.
It’s worth remembering that our neighbors are just as American as we are, even if they snack on grilled tofu instead of seared steak.
After all, are we really so different?
Okay, okay, maybe we are. But you don’t have to yell. Besides, there’s still a lot in the Declaration of Independence that unites us.
It states that we all have unalienable rights, that among them are life, liberty, and the pursuit of flat screen televisions.—I mean, happiness.

And it blames a lot of stuff on the British king, which lives up to our rich American tradition of never taking the blame for anything.
It’s worth reading the Declaration of Independence on July 4.
Not only does it make you seem smart (and it does), it makes you aware of more stuff worth celebrating.
Today, we celebrate that when we read the phrase “all men are created equal,” we include women and people of color.
Today, we celebrate that when we read the phrase “unalienable rights,” we live in a country that safeguards and guarantees them for everyone, even for a lowly humor columnist.
Today, we celebrate. But we shouldn’t forget the sacrifices that lead to this point.
We shouldn’t forget how Washington’s army marched through snow and ice to beat the British, nor the unstylish clothing people were forced to wear at the time.
We shouldn’t forget how Abraham Lincoln delivered the Gettysburg Address, affirming to a nation at war that we would never surrender, nor learn what length of time “four score” meant.
We shouldn’t forget that America is a constantly changing thing, that it’s shaped in new ways by all Americans every day.
Let’s remember our founding ideals. Let’s remember our unalienable or inalienable or analienable principles, whichever they are.
And let’s have a wonderful Fourth of July.

Copyright 2025 Alexandra Paskhaver, distributed exclusively by Cagle Cartoons newspaper syndicate.